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TEXAS
CHAINSAW MASSACRE: THE BEGINNING |
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"Is Jordana Related
To Punky Brewster?" |
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Directed by Jonathan
Liebesman - Written by
Sheldon Turner
Starring R. Lee Ermey,
Andrew Bryniarski,
Jordana Brewster, Taylor
Handley
Distributed by New Line -
2006 - 84mins - Rated R |
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Richard Propes'
Review
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D+ |
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This is how it all began... |
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There's something
horribly wrong about going to see "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The
Beginning" on the second day of a hunger strike against violence
towards children.
Pondering that humorous little tidbit may, in fact, be more
entertaining than anything you're going to see in the latest in the
"Texas Chainsaw" films.
This film, which takes us back to the beginning of the story, attempts
to explain the origins of Leatherface and the family behind
generations of massacres.
To his credit, director Jonathan Liebesman ("Darkness Falls") at least
figured out one of the keys to the original film's legendary
status..."the look" of the film. That film, widely considered by many
to be one of the best horror films ever made, had a grainy, almost
documentary feel to its cinematography that greatly enhanced the
film's effectiveness, scariness and ability to induce anxiety without
resorting to special effects and rampant blood spattering.
That grainy, almost faded look is present here in "Texas Chainsaw
Massacre: The Beginning." To be completely honest, it's one of the
biggest reasons I held out such high hopes for this film and had it as
one of my most anticipated films of Fall 2006.
Unfortunately, the similarities between Tobe Hooper's 1974 classic and
this film stop squarely at that faded look. The soul of the film is,
sadly, much closer to the 2003 remake of the 1974 film...a remake that
made money, but was clearly as pathetic an idea as that awful "Psycho"
of Gus Van Sant's a few years back.
Actually, the "Texas Chainsaw Massacre" remake is MORE pathetic.
In "Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning," we learn the sad truth
about Leatherface's discovery as a baby in a trash can, while we
quickly travel through his school years and a job in a slaughterhouse.
When Leatherface, a nickname he carries throughout childhood, is
dismissed from his job, well, surely you see where this is going?
From here, we have R. Lee Ermey back as the "sheriff." Of course, we
learn the real story behind the horror... Ermey's "Uncle Hoyt" has
merely assumed the identity of a sheriff he killed. Ermey's killing,
Leatherface's killing of his boss and, well, a stereotypically inbred,
cannibalistic family all leads us to this latest shriekfest in Texas.
For many of you who have seen Jessica Biel in the marvelous "The
Illusionist" this year, it may be hard to remember that she was
actually in the 2003 remake of "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre." Who knew
that such shrieking truly required talent? Whereas Biel was, at the
very least, convincing in a one-note role, Jordana Brewster is simply
irritating. Of course, she isn't given the chance to do much since
Liebesman seems more intent on filming her from behind than ever
challenging her to actually act.
This prequel takes place during the Vietnam era. The "victims" in
question are two young men, one about to head off for the war while
the other plans to dodge the draft and head to Canada. Of course, they
are on a road trip through Texas with their young, nubile girlfriends
when they are "rescued" by Sheriff Hoyt.
Oops.
Perhaps one of the joys for true fans of horror will lie in the fact
that nobody survives here. This is, after all, the story of the
original killings...and we've known for years the result of these
killings. Watching Brewster get slaughtered is a bit like watching
Paris Hilton get it in "House of Wax." She's irritating for so long
that it's just not as painful to watch it happen.
Sadly, while Liebesman got the look of the original film correctly he
failed miserably in capturing the original film's mood, timing or
suspense. Instead, he resorts to that most common of horror
techniques...nonstop blood spattering and grossness.
Unfortunately, much like the family scenes, this action is so
over-the-top and cartoonish it's more funny than horrifying. There are
several scenes in "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" that
are simply laugh out loud funny.
The cast is equally cartoonish, including Ermey. While Ermey is
practically the master at this type of role, isn't there some point
where it's time to move on? Quite honestly, this is more silly than it
is convincing. Likewise, Andrew Bryniarski is back from the 2003
remake...but, truly, who cares?
In supporting roles, Taylor Handley, Matthew Bomer and Diora Baird all
die quite nicely with sufficient shots of suffering and torture.
Liebesman, too, does include more chainsaw shots...which makes calling
this "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre" much more logical than it has been
in recent film incarnations.
"Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" is your run-of-the-mill
horror film that borrows the look of the 1974 Tobe Hooper film and
sets it in a 2006 bloodbath that falls far short of Hooper's original
film.
Not so surprisingly, the door is left wide open for further reprisals
of the "Texas Chainsaw" franchise.
Of all the massacres that have occurred over the years as part of the
"Texas Chainsaw" films, the most painful of all to watch is this...the
massacre of one legendary film's reputation at the hands of the most
ruthless killer of them all for today's cinema...Hollywood itself. |
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© Written by Richard Propes -
Email Me! |
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How We Rated This Film
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TC Candler -
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| Richard Propes
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D+ |
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Jacob Hall
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TC Candler's Comment
n/a
Jacob Hall's
Comment
n/a
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