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"How Do You Give An
Ant A Wedgie?" |
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Directed by John A.
Davis - Written by John
A. Davis, John Nickle
Starring Zach Tyler,
Meryl Streep, Julia
Roberts, Nicolas Cage,
Paul Giamatti
Distributed by Warner
Brothers - 2006 - 88mins
- Rated PG |
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Richard Propes'
Review
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C |
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Stomping into theaters... |
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I guess there are just
so many ways you can draw an ant.
From the opening moments of "Ant Bully," the latest film from John
Davis ("Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius"), it is readily apparent that we
are in for an exercise in cinematic mediocrity.
Despite being produced by Tom Hanks and featuring voice work from an
all-star cast, "Ant Bully" is remarkable only for its complete lack of
entertainment value and the all too familiar presentation of the ants
in question.
What is it about ants, anyway?
There was, of course, that wonderful little film featuring Woody
Allen, called "Antz." Then, there was the even more entertaining "A
Bug's Life." Now, there's "Ant Bully," based upon a short children's
book by John Nickle.
Are we getting all of our life lessons for kids from ants these days?
Unfortunately, the life lessons in "Ant Bully" come in the form of
"hit you over the head" moralizing statements made by the various
ants. These statements are often verbalized with great intensity,
perhaps to guarantee that even the dimmest child in the audience gets
the lesson.
The story centers around Lucas Nickle (Hmmm. How odd. The author gives
the nerdish bully his own last name. Is this whole thing an act of
repentance?), a young nerdish boy who gets picked on regularly by
neighborhood bullies. Young Lucas (voiced by Zach Tyler), who is known
as "The Destroyer" by the ants, bullies the ants because they are
smaller than him.
Life lesson #'s 1 and 2...There is an abusive cycle that gets handed
down from bully to bully AND very often it involves bigger picking on
smaller. Okay, got it.
Unknown to Lucas, however, ants aren't the mindless, powerless drones
he believes...instead, they are intelligent, organized and
community-minded creatures not that far from humans.
Life lesson #3...We're not all that different so we should find a way
to get along! Cool, got it!
After Lucas floods an ant colony with his water hose, the wizard Ant,
Zok (Nicolas Cage) sneaks into Lucas's bedroom and slips a magic
potion in his ear. This, in turn, reduces Lucas to the size of an ant.
Lucas is brought before the Queen Ant (Meryl Streep), and is sentenced
to hard time in the colony under the guidance of Hova (Julia Roberts)
and her friends, Kreela (Regina King) and Fugax (Bruce Campbell).
The life lessons are, by now, too immense in numbers to mention,
however, suffice it to say there will be lessons in community,
friendship, kindness, ecology and, well, politics. They will all band
together to ward off the evil exterminator (Paul Giamatti), and there
will, of course, be a cute and warm and fuzzy happy ending.
With all this star power, it's utterly amazing that the film's only
true stand-out is Bruce Campbell. Campbell, whose Fugax is energetic,
fun and unique, almost singlehandedly elevates the film above
mediocrity.
However, it's hard to have fun during a film in which it feels like
you are constantly being bombarded with statements of key importance
followed by moments of ant action designed to keep the kiddies'
attention.
While the book "Ant Bully" is a sparse 29 page children's book, it
contains infinitely more charm and wit and entertainment value than
this film in its nearly 90 minute length.
Even potentially entertaining add-ons featuring Ricardo Montalban and
Lily Tomlin fall remarkably flat. Tomlin, in particular, is stuck
performing the same comic set-up repeatedly...unfortunately it's not
funny the first time, the second time or the third time.
"Ant Bully" is attractive to look at, but it all looks remarkably
familiar. While nobody in the cast is particularly bad, with names
like Streep, Cage and Giamatti I think I have a right to expect
something special...nobody ever delivers that something special. If
you've ever heard Streep narrate "The Velveteen Rabbit," then you'll
find yourself remarkably disappointed by her offering here.
It is hard not to be troubled by a film that seems obsessed with
teaching about community and friendship, but ends up preaching more
about conformity and self-sacrifice. I couldn't help but think to
myself that this is how the abusive cycle actually perpetuates itself.
Thus, these were the real life lessons I received from "Ant Bully":
1) Children get bullied.
2) Children look for way to express feelings, and sometimes turn into
bullies.
3) Instead of being listened to, supported or helped they are, in
turn, judged, punished and, at times, even humiliated for the sake of
teaching a "lesson."
4) The child "learns a lesson," but loses their individuality and
conforms as a way of survival.
If these sound like life lessons you want your children to learn, then
bully for you...go see "Ant Bully." If you'd rather have your child be
entertained, encouraged or empowered then rent "Antz," "A Bug's Life"
or, heck, just go see "Cars" for the third time!
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© Written by Richard Propes -
Email Me! |
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How We Rated This Film
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TC Candler -
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| Richard Propes
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Jacob Hall
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TC Candler's Comment
n/a
Jacob Hall's
Comment
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