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"Because every
intense confrontation
must take place in the
rain..." |
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Directed by Justin Lin -
Written by David Collard
Starring James Franco,
Tyrese Gibson, Jordana
Brewster, Donnie
Wahlberg
Distributed by Buena
Vista - 2006 - 108 mins
- Rated PG-13 |
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Jacob Hall's
Review
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D+ |
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Tristan joins the navy! |
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It’s
impossible to not have expectations when you walk into a movie, no
matter how hard you try to be professional or open-minded. The trailer
for “Annapolis” suggested that I would be viewing a harmless, overly
patriotic film about never giving up and joining the Navy and being a
real man. Much to my surprise, I got a boxing movie. A freaking boxing
movie.
It also has a romantic subplot, a story about a fat fellow trying to
make his hometown proud, at least three or four major rivalries, a
father-son-brother conflict and some zany characters…that certainly
sounds like enough to fill a film, right? Well, apparently not.
James Franco (seen earlier this month in the even worse “Tristan and
Isolde”) stars as Jake Huard, a young man who wants to make his dead
mother and apathetic father proud as well as escape from his dead-end
job by joining the navy. He falls in love with one of his instructors.
An officer serves as a wise mentor. His drill instructor makes his
life a living hell. I bet you have seen NOTHING like this ever before.
In the opening scenes, I was absolutely certain “Annapolis” was going
to be a flag-waving tearjerker…we get the shots of the lonely hero
learning that he has been accepted into the prestigious officer’s
training school (instead of “messing around in college”) and he and
his 1,199 other recruits all walk toward the camera (and the Annapolis
gates) in slow motion while an electric guitar spews notes akin to
that you would see in one of those “join the army!” propaganda ads you
see before the movie actually started.
When the film quickly shifts gears and becomes a third rate “Rocky”
rip-off with Huard trying to beat his domineering instructor Cole (Tyrese
Gibson) in a boxing match, the effect is jarring and comical…we are
treated to every boxing cliché in the book and even a few bits that
are completely new and just as embarrassing. Cole tells Huard that he
would be a bad officer and we are meant to feel sympathy for Huard. I
agree with Cole. Huard is a whiny bitch who pouts, breaks rules,
spends all of his time training for boxing and, well, genuinely sucks
at being a soldier in the few scenes that we do soldiering in.
I am certain I am not giving anything away when I saw Huard achieves
his dreams in the end. We all KNOW it is coming. This would have to be
your first piece of fictional entertainment for you to be surprised by
the outcome of it. Every event in “Annapolis” feels like it was part
of a “fill-in-the-blank” screenplay, and I’ve seen this particular
version about 28 times.
There is one surprising subplot: the subplot about the overweight guy
trying to make it through the academy is clichéd to say the least, but
where it ends up is equally head scratching and morbidly hilarious. I
shouldn’t have been laughing…but it was handled so poorly, with so
little skill, that the end result is riotously campy.
Reasons to see “Annapolis:” Co-star Jordana Brewster is a very
attractive woman, even if her character never leaves a mark and only
exists to provide a cheesy romantic subplot. Tyrese Gibson plays a
character whom we are supposed to find respectable, well-trained and
eloquent (A fine laugh indeed). Franco provides another painfully
hard-to-watch-yet-hilarious performance.
And finally, I have no doubt in my mind that this is a future camp
classic. Enjoy it now so you can say you were there at the beginning!
(This is my fourth film seen in 2006 and my highest grade so far has
been a C-. If this year doesn't shape up soon, I may take it off!) |
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© Written by Jacob Hall |
TC Candler's Comment
n/a
Richard
Propes' Comment
I'm still
waiting for movie studios to figure out how to
adequately use James Franco. Thankfully, he
directed and starred in the much more
entertaining "The Ape" in the past year. It
seems like major studios want to use him, but
can't figure out how. TIP: This ain't it.
Actually, he's one of the best parts of the
film, but that's really not saying much in this
case.
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